I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize