I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just found puke in my bra..
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
