youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can u get pink eye on your cock?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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