I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize