Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize