is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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