Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I see more hoeing in ur future
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