some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
