Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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