you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz