I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know