East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
