The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
