I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
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His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
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If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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