Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
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