I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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