actually, I'm a sock model
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
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