u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
operation have a gay friend backfired
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
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