Wat do u mean how?
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it