He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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