If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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