morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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