I saw his package. It spoke to me.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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