Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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