Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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