Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize