I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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