well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Randomize
