That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
