Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
