Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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