operation harelip BJ is a go
you will always have a special place in my vag
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm sobbing to NWA
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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