I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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