I think my vagina is haunted
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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