The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
