Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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