You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
