lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
