so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
