yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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