Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
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