Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize