she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
