TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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