That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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