sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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