So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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