Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
sex in a hospital.. check
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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