I wanna bring you to show and tell
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
