yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
