The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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